hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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