Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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