It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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