we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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