I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
