I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
