Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
