Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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