imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
