just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
