So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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