Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
The uberlube is also flammable
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
