I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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