I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
