Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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