wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
It's just like the Real World with babies
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize