You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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