The maid of honor just puked.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
