how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
