it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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