Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
