listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize