Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
