and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize