you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
