yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
