I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
