I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
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