I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
