Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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