If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Small penises have feelings too.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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