i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
