I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
