At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
they need to just BURY HIM!
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
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