Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Randomize
