adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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