piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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