Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
