ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
