yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
