Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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