Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
