i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
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