Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
So vagazzling was a success
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
