I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Randomize
