The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize