I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
they're like a gay fantastic four
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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