butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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