Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
