if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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