The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I think people are normalizing furries
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
